Emo Philips Talks with R. Chris Brown

Emo Philips has been called everything from "a one-man asylum, worth the trip" (the Boston Globe) to "a cascade of comedy invention" (the Scotsman.)Jay Leno called him "the best joke writer in America". He has performed extensively on stage both in the US and overseas, and he has appeared on HBO, Cinemax, and Comedy Central - and recently appeared in animated form on the ABC-Family cartoon series "Slacker Cats" as the voice of Dooper the Cat. He's definitely a man who took the road less traveled by - and his cadre of loyal fans (or "Emo-philiacs", as they prefer to be called) follow him on his journey - so now read this interview and learn more about this man, this myth, this Emo. (And don't forget to check out his website at http://www.emophilips.com ....)

INTERVIEW QUESTIONS

What is it that first attracted you to the world of comedy?

E: As a child, my mother would laugh hysterically at everything I said, so I thought, "I should be a comedian."Many years later, I realized that she laughed hysterically at everything that everyone said... but by then it was too late, as I had already made it.

Did you ever consider any other careers?


E: "Career" is a strong word, but I have had other jobs. In high school one summer I was a janitor at an animal testing lab. Believe me, EVERYTHING is more fun than a barrel of monkeys.

The New Yorker said about you "If Kafka had done standup comedy, he might have talked and looked like Emo Philips." Do you feel this is a fair comparison?

E: Not at all. You go onstage in a beetle costume just once....

You reportedly started in comedy in 1976, our nation's bicentennial. Is there any link between those two events?

E: Yes. I wanted to get away from the British soldier my mother was lodging.

You have performed extensively in the British Isles.How do you see that as different from performing in America?

E: Unlike America, the British don't carry guns. When you suspect that some of your audience is packing, it can't help but rush your timing.

Do you ever suffer from stage fright?

E: Yes, but very quickly I transfer it to the audience.

You appeared in the animated series "Dr. Katz" as yourself. What is the most difficult aspect of being in an animated series, and what is the most difficult part about playing yourself?

E:The trickiest thing about doing Dr Katz was that the animators would have to draw me solely from my vocal track... so after laying it down, I walked into the next room, to where the animators were working, and I did twenty minutes of my act right in front of them, to ensure that they would have my mannerisms, bearing, ethos, and what have you, down cold. And as it turns out, they were a really great audience. I'm sorry I didn't tape it for a cable special.

You did a voiceover role in the ABC-Family animated series "Slacker Cats", as the homeless cat Dooper.How did that come about?

E: My agent, as did every agent in Los Angeles, received the audition call sheet for Slacker Cats, and it described Dooper as "like Emo Philips."So naturally, he sent me to read for the role, and in my opinion, I nailed me. I then waited two weeks with no word, my despair growing day-by-day; I'd pace the house thinking,"Oh, no... I can't even do Emo Philips right." Then the phone call came that I got the part, and I was elated. (It turns out the two writers of the show, who live in England, saw me at the Edinburgh Festival way back in 1989, and that fortunately I had stuck in their consciousnesses.)

Your character Dooper on "Slacker Cats" seems to be very worried about conspiracies.Are there any conspiracies you'd like to warn us about now?

E: I've noticed that Keira Knightly's price per film seems to be rising at exactly the same rate as the cost of crude oil. Coincidence?

Do you find that being a comedian has enhanced any aspect of your life?

E:Being a comedian has allowed me to embrace a lifestyle completely different from that of the rest of humanity. For instance, I never have to drive (which, believe me, is also very good for the rest of humanity.)

Some of your most controversial material deals with religion. Have you ever considered starting your own?

E: I'd have to discontinue my medication.

You were the producer of the original version of "Meet The Parents." How would you describe the difference between your movie and the later remake?

E: The original has no stars, was shot on 16 mm, is 72 minutes long, and has an ending that, let's just say, is not sequel- friendly. As good as the re-make is, I (and many others, bless them) think the original is even funnier; it actually gets the longest laugh I have ever heard in a theater.

You once said "Marrying a woman for sex is like buying a tiger for transportation."Could you give any advice about would be a good reason to marry a woman?

E: The only reason to get married is for love; all others should be prohibited by law.

What about a good reason to buy a tiger?

E: If you're in love with it. (But then you should do that whole "let it free and see if it returns" thing... although, ideally, not near a schoolyard.)

What advice would you give to aspiring young comedians out there?

E: The great thing about stand-up is that any advice about it is worthless. (It is also the great thing for me, whenever I get asked that question.)

And the final question- based on what you've learned in your life and your travels, what is the most valuable piece of advice you can give?

E: Cell phones are like a dog's nipples: You don't have to SHOUT into them

Contributing Writer - R. Chris Brown